Let me tell you about the phrase “I can tell who wears the pants in that family” because I have an internal reaction every time I hear it. If you’re not familiar it is used to describe a woman who appears strong, dominant, bossy, coordinated, well-spoken, in charge, and sometimes equates to a woman’s ability to emasculate a man with her words. I know this practice well because I was once in a relationship with an older man who would make his opinions known about a woman who might have an aggressive edge. I began to understand it was about female dominance and the male insecurities. If a man can keep a woman under his thumb, at his beck and call, then she makes him feel superior.

When I am not gallivanting around town at shows, events and creating mischief, then I am usually working at my “real” job. I have owned and operated a small business for nearly ten years, purchased it outright, and maintain the revenue stream to support myself and a few employees. I lead with an environment that rewards initiative, consistency, and excellence. My employees want to work for me because I am strict with a balance of compassion. This is the same “work hard, play hard” mentality I have always used to achieve my goals.

When my ex would inevitably say “…who wears the pants” my head would correct him and say “it’s a skirt damnit!” Because I believe that ultimately as proven by scientists, women make men’s lives better without a doubt, and if the woman isn’t leading in the relationship (at the very least topping from the bottom) then she’s probably not in tune with any of her power. We tend to do this relinquishing of power when we don’t know what to do with it. If a woman is not happy, then she will eventually leave the man because she can learn to be happy on her own. We have cats, teddy bears and vibrators…the cat lady is not a myth, it’s a woman owning her pussy power.

When I woke up today, I masturbated several times before having coffee. I knew today was going to be a very long work day tackling all kinds of work demands as well as interviewing several local subs for a local event, so I wanted to be sure I was in the absolute best mood possible before I put on my crown and took care of business. Or wait, I took care of business and then put on my crown…wow, I love all this business (as long as it’s talking about sex).

Anyhow, I harnessed my pussy power, I took care of her needs that in turn gave me an abundant dose of pleasure chemicals to endure me day. I made sure to instruct my wonderful Bear to send me his video he used to get off and to note the time he climaxed so I could be sure of his arousal cycle. I love knowing what excites him.

I have decided that I am going to embrace these pants, and I’m going to continue smashing the hell out of the societal boxes, owning both my feminine and masculine power in my whole self. The next time you wonder why we have a thing such as “rape culture” remind yourself that if women were truly able to harness their pussy potential then we would fucking rule the world. Men have to threaten to take it to take the power back. But what the heck do I know, I’m only the Queen of my own castle and no one died and let me lead you all, yet!